V.1.
On a certain occasion, my ears opened, and I heard an Archangel supplicating with the Lord of the Hosts of Heaven. He said,
V.2. "Lord, you are being too hard on her. I know her quite well; she would withdraw herself."
V.3. And the Lord said some things I wouldn't mention.
V.4. And the Archangel went on to say, "I have watched over her through the years. I know what she does when she's overwhelmed."
A few days later, I did withdraw. I cut off communication, and I went into hiding. I didn't want to commune with the Lord. I just wanted human company, yet I needed to be all by myself.
In the 9th hour, I heard the loud sound of a gushing wind. All the windows of my hideout clanged, and wind danced around my legs.
V. 5. Who can hide from the Lord? Nobody.
The Lord summoned me to the bedroom so I could rest my back and explain myself. I was terrified by all the thunder that followed. The Lord stood by the bedside. My heart was pounding, knowing the Lord himself had visited me once again, but now he was angry.
He asked me, "What are you doing here?" And he took me up.
V.6. I saw myself standing on many waters, and the waves couldn't be more unsteady. There was heavy rain, and I was standing on the water.
V.7. There was lots of thunder. I was so scared. I looked to my side and saw 7 tornadoes coming towards me. The wind was so fierce, it could have blown me away. These tornadoes were water bodies, and from the sky above me, the Lord spoke to me. He reprimanded me, and in all my terror, I asked the Lord,
"Lord, why is it when I finally did something bad, you rushed to my room? I stepped away from where you want me to be, and you rushed to reprimand me. When was the last time you visited my room...? If I hadn't disobeyed, would you have shown up?"
V.8. Deep down, I knew I hadn't been available to commune or host his presence.
And he told me, "Pack your bags and go back."
I said, "Lord, you know I'm in grave danger."
V.9. Then he said, "Allow me to fail to protect you. And if anything happens, you would come and be with me for eternity. So even if I can't protect you, you'd come home to me, your Father. But I am more than able to protect you and preserve your life. I have told you, I am always with you. I want you to always remember that."
V.10. And the Lord gave me commandments as the tornadoes drew nearer. I thought I was going to die because they came so close to me, and the wind grew fiercer. Nothing stood still. Even the Lord's voice terrified me.
V.11. And the next morning came. I didn't pack my bags, even till dusk. Now I was guilty; I had disobeyed yet again.
V.12. And the Lord showed up in my room again. This time, no wind, no thunder. No announcement, no terror. He came in quietly... And his glory filled the room. And I dodged and continued what I was doing because I was filled with guilt.
And he called out softly, "Can I have your attention?"
V.13. I said, "Lord, please leave me alone. I don't know, but I haven't been getting things right lately. I haven't been following your instructions, and I feel overwhelmed. Right now, I just don't want to be reminded of my insufficiency."
And I continued with what I was doing, worried, concerned, ashamed of my negligence.
v.14. Then he said, "I'd wait."
I was deeply moved, and I left everything I was doing. I welcomed the Lord, and we had an amazing Father-and-daughter time.
V:15. And he told me how proud he is and commended my efforts. He told me I needed more grace, and hard times come to build my capacity, not to show me my insufficiency.
V.16. This is the kind of relationship God desires to have with each and every one of us.
Christ didn't live a righteous life to be the perfect critic of your sins. He lived a righteous life so you can assume that righteousness in him, even with your past and present sins.
He wants your reliance on his sufficiency, not yours.
V.17. Love doesn't intimidate. The Lord has tried it, and it's been proven to be an unyielding method of parenting/leadership. People give their best when they are inspired by love, not fear.
The love of God is reckless. Not calculating how many would accept his son or reject him, he slayed him for the righteous requisite of salvation and reconciliation.
Sometimes we cannot contain such love because we feel inadequate, incapable, unworthy. But the plans God has for you are beyond marvelous. They are mouth-opening, breathtaking, and awe-inspiring. They are surreal.
V.18. Another day, I lay on my bed, enjoying the peace the Lord has bestowed upon me. The Lord came into my room quietly, so quietly I didn't realize he was there until I recognized his presence. I set my gaze upon the roof, and there I saw a majestic sight. I saw the reflection of precious stones on my P.O.P. The reflection twinkled and radiated in the most astonishing manner. While I was pondering and marveling, these reflections turned to eyes. I counted them, and they were 18 in number.
I quickly sprang from my bed and honoured his visitation by acknowledging his manifesting presence. And the Lord spoke to my heart.
"I'm not here to say anything; I just want you to know I am with you always."
And I smiled. And those eyes stayed there about half an hour, and I continued resting, staring back at the 18 eyes watching over me. And then I stood up to get some food, and when I came back, they were gone.
I blushed so hard, like I just received my favourite set of flowers.
V.19. My confidence is this: God loves me.
Hence, there's no more guilt and no more condemnation. I know no matter how angry I make him, I can always walk up to his throne room and kneel at his feet, and he would never kick me out. Not because of any face card nor fluency of speech, but because of his benevolence.
And because his love for me is so bold and immeasurable, I love him too.
Love is what unites; love is that which perfects and heals. Whatever the question is, love is always the answer.
Love shouldn't be ignored; it should be accepted and reciprocated.
V.20.
The different responses to love:
Rejection
People reject love when they do not believe in it nor understand its dynamics. It seems strange and unpredictable. It seems made up and fanatic. It seems hypocritical and fraudulent, so they scrutinize and criticize it.
(These are those who persecute Christ and his Body. They accuse the church of falsehood, and they always bring up schemes to destroy the reputation of the rejected. These people are outright murderers of anything good. They always search for faults and weaknesses to exploit. They do all the plus and minus and look for ways to exploit and manipulate love, and eventually, they trample on it.)
Neutrality/Indifference
These do believe in love, but do not wish to be conquered by it, because it weakens one's defenses and invades one's sense of reasoning.
(These are those who believe in God, but they are spectators. They don't want to infuriate him; neither do they want to embrace him. They watch and observe but do not open their hearts. They secretly yearn to receive the love but don't stretch out their arms. These acknowledge God, but obscure his precepts. The 'Nobody would use my head' gang. Very stubborn, very unyielding, yet they know the truth.
When many branded the Apostles of Jesus as mad men, these neutral ones paused to listen and pondered enough to understand. V.21. They saw them beyond madness and as gods. Yet, they did not accept their message.)
Fright and flight
V.22. This category feels the power of love; they are overwhelmed by its force, and they flee. They flee because it feels unfamiliar, especially when all they see is v.23. a world with constant hate.
V.24. They feel incapable of harnessing and reciprocating. They feel it would be the death of them.
V.25.(These are those who are too scared to take the Holy Communion, or to say the prayer of salvation. They fear God, they are also afraid of going to hell, yet in all their fear they do nothing about it, but flee.)
And this is why vs.26. God is ever patient, because what mere mortals see as outward rejection to his precepts is what God recognizes as hesitation, indifference, self-defense, and fear.
Vs.27.That is why God is long-suffering and ever-present. He is the Master of love.
Of course, he's tried other methods until he brought out his trump card. And this trump card was the sacrifice of his first begotten Son as a proof and demonstration of his earnest love, so we can see how far he's willing to go to have us in V.28. fellowship with him.
V.29. God is the fiercest lover. He's suffered rejection, indifference, desertion, unfaithfulness, but he's still standing, and he's still willing to make things work.
V.30. But one day, the last lost son would walk into His abode, and He would shut the door. There would be no coming in nor going out, like the Ark of Noah.
V.31. And there would be gnashing of teeth and crying and weeping, but the Lord would not repent.
Acceptance
V.32. Hence, while His mercy is still tender towards us, we should learn His ways and accept Him. He lowered His defenses; we should lower ours too, regardless of doubt, mistrust, and fear. If you accept His love, His sacrifice, and His son, whatever the challenge is, you'd figure it out together. And He'd protect you from all his enemies round about.
Let's rededicate our love for Him together:
V.33. "Lord, I love you. Yes, I love you, Lord. I accept your love, Son, the Christ
—the perfect sacrifice and perfect demonstration of your bold love.
Costly, yet priceless. I accept the place you've called me into... Christ,
where I'm seated with you to reign and rule. I open all of my heart to you,
and I trust you with my life. I repent of my negligence, and as from today,
V.34. I devote myself to fellowship with you. I know you are able to order my
steps and keep me from falling. It is you and I—as it should have been at
the creation of time—always and forever." Amen.
V.35.Congratulations, you are legitimately a Child of God and a bride of Christ. Cheers.
V.36. Safeguard your love for God and submit to his Lordship, his rulership, and his relationship. Yes, Christianity is a relationship with God: friendship, parenting, partnership, comradeship, and leadership. He is your everything, so let him.
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